To The Man Who Called Me A Pedophile
To The Man Who Called Me A Pedophile
I'm not mad at you. I feel bad for you.
I recently posted a video of my experience going to a Drag Story Hour in NYC. The video's moral was that we were having fun inside while needless mayhem ensued, outside. Inside, we were having fun, eating snacks, and listening to poetry from Maya Angelou read by a drag performer. The performer was a non-binary trans person who used fae/faer pronouns. That alone goes far beyond most people's knowledge of gender theory—especially the type of person seeking to erase us. The people protesting outside the story hour can’t fathom a world beyond penis means man and vagina means subservience.
Personally, I had a blast. There were TONS of single-serving Oreos which kept me pacified while several LGBTQ parents chased their adorable kids around. My kiddo sprinted to the rainbow-colored mat to hang out with the other children and practiced yoga poses. Soon the room was filled with news cameras, photographers, journalists, politicians, and their assistants. For every child, there must have been 4-6 adults which were in some parts annoying but also reassuring.
In my post, one of the goals was to show how unbothered my family was by all this. The difficult truth is we are unbothered because we’re used to it. Whether people realized it or not, hatred of trans people had never left. Neither did racism, anti-Semitism, and all the other versions of discrimination. It was just easier for those of privileged identities to pretend they were. The same people who eradicated my gender-diverse ancestors are back again doing the same thing. And we’re back—even stronger than before.
The comments in my post were mostly very kind and supportive. Most people are simply confused by this strange and antiquated narrative that all gay people are pedophiles. In fact, conservatives seem to think everyone who isn’t holding a Trump flag is a pedophile and somehow Trump’s connection to Jeffery Epstein means nothing. Somehow they will still vote for Matt Gaetz. And they’ll still send their children to the youth pastor’s house.
A person, whose username I won’t even mention, commented with the usual nonsense. Bla, bla, bla, groomers, bla, bla, bla, but the children! I’m sure their favorite republican politician will support the children by giving their funding for school and social programs, to the rich, and to the police. Not that the Dems have been much better.
He eventually started targeting me personally, calling me a pedophile and *insert slur here*. I realized a friend of mine had come to my defense. A cis/het leftist activist who is very heavily involved in progressive political work.
This is where the tone changed. The anonymous person posted my friend's personal phone number and address in the comments. I have no idea how they got my friend's information and I wondered if they had mine. We both reported and blocked him. I don’t have a blue check mark or a large enough following for Instagram to react to this sort of thing so I doubt anything will come of it.
Contrary to my headline, I have no idea what to say to this person. The best thing I can think to do is to try to put myself in their shoes. They're clearly suffering. Clearly afraid of what they sense to be a threat. They see the world as becoming unstable and they blame the recent acceptance of progressive ideologies as the culprit. They think returning to the “family values” (racist and phobic values) of the 50s will fix things again. They’re willing to sacrifice me, all transgender people, and every other identity that doesn’t fit theirs to achieve security in their own life. They’re clearly mistaken.
If I had a chance to speak to them, that’s likely what I’d say. We’re all suffering and the only way to stop is to let go of this idea of separation. If only they would listen.
To the misguided person on Instagram, I’m not mad at you. I just wish you would do better.